I had the privilege to review 4 Days to a Forever Marriage: Choosing Love or Anger by Gary & Norma Smalley as part of the Moms of Masterbooks Review team.
As you are more than likely aware, we live in a society where roughly 50% of marriages end in divorce. Norma Smalley says:
“But I’ve seen the devastation done to individuals – men and women as well as children – and families by separation and divorce, and I never want any part of that. Even more, when I vowed on our wedding day to love and remain faithful to Gary, I was making a promise to God. I was making it to Gary as well, but I was especially making it to God, and I take that very seriously.”
I love that!
One of the things that I love about this particular book is that it was written from a husband’s perspective and a wife’s perspective. Another thing I love is the title – we can CHOOSE anger, or we can CHOOSE to act out of love.
Day 1 – Loving Words and Actions
I’ve honestly never thought of drawing word pictures for my husband. He likes when I tell him stories of our day, especially when I embellish on the craziness, but I don’t often think to do this in terms of how I’m feeling.
Day 2 – Communication and Resolving Anger
Oh my goodness the snoring issue – I had to read this one out loud to my husband! They use a situation (that perhaps many of us are experiencing in our marriages!) to remind us that sometimes we get angry with our spouse when there’s an underlying bigger problem that may be out of their immediate control.
Day 3 – Affection & Intimacy
Do you get upset when your husband doesn’t hold your hand or put his arm around you (or otherwise acts like he knows you) in public? Gary encourages husbands to ask their wives “What would you like me to do to show publicly that I love you?”. He also reminds us as the wives to tell our husbands what we need from them if they don’t initiate the question.
“Many men don’t realized it, but more than 80 percent of a woman’s need for meaningful touch is nonsexual. Sex does not begin in the bedroom. It actually starts in the everyday acts of truthfulness, consistency, kindness, touching, and talking that build a growing desire in a woman.”
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard this from other women….AMEN, Gary!
Kidding aside….the Smalleys talk about ways to make your home secure (so that you both feel comfortable expressing yourselves to one another) and how to make (nonsexual) touch meaningful.
Day 4 – Trials & Treasures
“No one likes trials, yet no one can escape them. We can let them ruin our lives – making us bitter, angry, and resentful – or we can look for the treasure that will let us love and serve others.”
Each of the 4 days has a question section for the husband and the wife, as well as a “Principle step of the day” for each one.
I thought this was a great little book. If you would like to own a copy of your own, they can be purchased from New Leaf Publishing Group for $16.99, or you can WIN a copy of it at our Twitter party! Here are the details:
Join us Tuesday, November 15 at 8:00 pm CST/9 PM EST
-use the hashtag #teachthetruth
-use the hashtag #tttrollcall to let us know you’ve “checked in”.
Hope to see you there!
Disclosure: I received a complimentary copy of this as part of the Moms of MasterBooks Review team from New Leaf Publishing Group. All opinions and thoughts are my own. I did not receive any monetary compensation in exchange for my review.